Death in the Knife

My Photo
Location: Canada

Monday, September 25, 2006

Push it to the Limit

Im going to send out some post cards in the next couple days. Email me your address if you want me to send a personalized piece of mail to you.

I got attacked by a troll lady on saturday. She bear hugged me from behind on the dance floor at one of the bars here. The trolls work in teams. One of them got to Ben, and tried to eat him. Luckily, he managed to get away. It was clos, but i managed to escape as well. I was a victim of her grasps. A victim of a 4 foot troll's malfeasance. If I didn't get away, I would probably be on a spit right now over a fire and under a bridge.

Yellowknife Trolls have a long and rich history throughout the city, and are infamous for snatching Humans for a tasty dinner. There prescence in the city can be traced back to the mid 19th century where gold miners would mysteriously dissappear from there camps. There was no official documentation of the existence of Trolls until 1938, where the first photograph of a Yellowknife Troll was taken by Lancer McDougall, a British Prospector. Since McDougall's photo, miners became more aware of the dangerous threat Trolls placed upon the Great Slave Region. Troll Posts were set up along campground borders to protect miners from Troll infiltration, but unfortunately these measures were not enough to stop them from kidnapping the miners and stealing there seed to create half human/ half troll babies. Throughout the sixties and seventies and even nineties, trolls have become increasingly more similar in appearance to humans through cross-breeding, allowing them to enter public places undetected. In 2006, an estimated 250 Trolls have left their nests under local bridges in the area, entering bars and nightclubs to feast on younger humans.

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Fun with Hatchets

Sunday, September 10, 2006

Thursday, September 07, 2006

Im a Cop you idiot!

I was almost a cop yesterday. A real cop. I has an assignment to post a notice on a squatters shack telling the occupants to get out. My boss told me that the mission would be dangerous, so I was to go with a municipal enforcement officer. I was to be escorted with the shield in his very own vehicle. Me riding shotgun with the boys in blue. Or black, cause they wear black here. We were to go from downtown to old town to face our suspects. They would give me a govenrment issued gun. Staple gun that is, to post up the notice to warn these low lives to get out of the shacks they are squatting in. It would be dangerous, but they knew I was the man for the job. They knew I could walk the beat and tackle the heat. I was their development officer. If they were to provoke us in any way, I have the training for these situations. I know what the stakes are. When the pressure is on, they know who to call.
Of course at the last minute they said it was a no go for legal reasons and my dreams were shot. All of this was in my head too. This happened at work, but didn't really happen.

Monday, September 04, 2006

Terry and his dumb ideas...he doesn't know anything about kids!

Locations of visitors to this page